It’s that time of year again and I welcome you to the 2014 Oscars Live Blog with up-to-the-minute live winners, commentary, red carpet coverage and overall merriment. We are kicking this thing off around 3:30-4 PM PST or so and carrying on until 9 PM PST or whenever this thing ends, which means you better have food, water and perhaps a tasty beverage or two because it’s going to be a long night.
I’ve already posted right here. As far as my predicting prowess is concerned, the last two years I’ve ended the night getting 19 out of 24 correct, I really want to at least get 20 this year… we’ll see.
Should the night work out as I predicted, here’s how the wins would shape out with 12 Years a Slave being my pick to win Best Picture:
- Gravity – 6 wins
- 12 Years a Slave – 4 wins
- Dallas Buyers Club – 3 wins
- Frozen – 2 wins
- American Hustle – 1 win
- Blue Jasmine – 1 win
- The Great Beuaty – 1 win
- The Great Gatsby – 1 win
- Her – 1 win
- 20 Feet from Stardom – 1 win
As for what you can expect from this live blog, we will be posting up-to-the-second commentary with each update having either my name in red or Laremy’s name in blue next to the time stamp. All winner announcements will be
So get ready, in just a few short hours it all begins and hopefully you’re prepared. We’ll be back around 3:30 PST / 6:30 EST and we won’t stop until the last award is handed out.
Stay tuned, we’ll be beginning shortly…
[3:04:05 PM] Brad says: Just a quick test to make sure things are working. We have E! on and it is riveting stuff. Did you hear it’s raining in L.A.?!?!?! The horror!
[3:05:08 PM] Brad says: Okay, it works… I’ll be here periodically for the next hour or so and we’ll really get up and running at 4 PM PST.
[3:06:14 PM] Brad says: Oh, wait, Ryan Seacrest just announced there’s a blimp, which he hopes means the weather will get better. We do too Ryan, we’re praying for you.
[3:07:15 PM] Laremy says: I don’t think I can watch E!. Or really any channel that ends in an exclamation point.
[3:09:38 PM] Laremy says: Hello. It is I. I am here.
[3:20:16 PM] Laremy says: I’m considering just watching E! on mute as an experiment. I’d also like to report I have NO FOOD right now. Why? Because I’m in New Orleans, at Mardi Gras, and every block is impassable. When I dialed up a pizza place a mere six blocks away they just laughed and said, “Yeah, no, we’re not going to be able to get to there.” Laremy = Sad panda.
[3:23:54 PM] Brad says: It’s amazing watching these people try and fill time before celebrities actually show up.
[3:25:47 PM] Brad says: Oh wait, nevermind, Kristin Chenoweth is there with Dana Brunetti (producer of The Social Network, Captain Phillips). Flash bulbs are a poppin’!
[3:29:30 PM] Brad says: Amy Adams has arrived a little early and everyone is excited. “Get out of the way!” shouts Kelly Osbourne as now we’ve moved on to crushing on a pregnant Olivia Wilde, as Kelly tells us the importance of her wearing black. Sorry, I didn’t catch the reasoning.
[3:32:16 PM] Brad says: Ryan Seacrest’s interview with Barkhad Abdi was a little uncomfortable, Abdi doesn’t have enough prepared, stock answers, someone prep him please.
[3:34:03 PM] Brad says: I have a feeling the weather is going to be a major topic all night.
[3:38:39 PM] Laremy says: To me, the fashion this year rivals the great fashion Oscars of 2007. Remember all the dresses from that one?
[3:39:49 PM] Laremy says: Seacrest asking about due dates is slightly creepy.
[3:41:59 PM] Brad says: Dax Shepard and Kristen Bell are at the Oscars. They aren’t nominated.
[3:44:12 PM] Brad says: Chiwetel Ejiofor and Ryan Seacrest are having a conversation about 12 Years a Slave and now Ryan is showing him pictures of Ejiofor’s sister and now a video of his sister congratulating him. I think Ejiofor might cry.
[3:44:51 PM] Brad says: Amy Adams is wearing Gucci Couture. So, stop wondering.
[3:45:33 PM] Brad says: Oh dear, a “lip gloss disaster” happened on the set during the Jennifer Lawrence and Amy Adams kissing scene. Sounds like it was quite harrowing.
[3:47:01 PM] Brad says: Kellan Lutz is rocking the Oscars red carpet, proving anyone can attend.
[3:47:15 PM] Laremy says: I’d love to wear Penguin to the Oscars. Also, sidenote, I’ll never get invited to the Oscars.
[3:48:02 PM] Laremy says: Actual quote: “The headband is EVERYTHING!”
[3:48:32 PM] Brad says: The rain has taken out E!’s fashion cam, but Giuliana tells us she is “slightly obsessed” with Lupita Nyong’o‘s headband.
[3:49:17 PM] Laremy says: If your mom names you “John Legend” you pretty much have to become a big deal, right?
[3:52:40 PM] Brad says: Pharrell Williams isn’t wearing his ten gallon hat. That’s too bad.
[3:54:59 PM] Laremy says: Both Pharrell and Bruce Dern have gone out their way to praise Seacrest. From what I understand, if you cross him, he’ll bury you. Remember Brian Dunkelman? Don’t get on the wrong side of Seacrest you guys, don’t do it. Trust me.
[3:55:21 PM] Laremy says: Pretty solid Match.com commercial there.
[3:56:52 PM] Laremy says: % chance old white dudes end up voting for the old white dude (Dern) to win Best Actor? [navaneethks]
Two percent. Tops. He’s TOO old, the 65-year-old guys still want to feel “young”.
[3:58:07 PM] Laremy says: Ryan Seacrest is asking Ethan Hawke how he “does it”. It being acting.
[3:58:48 PM] Brad says: Love seeing Julie Delpy on the red carpet despite her comments, which I posted earlier today.
[3:59:07 PM] Laremy says: I’m switching over to ABC, while Brad is sticking with E!. Advantage: Me.
[3:59:55 PM] Brad says: Ross and Kelly have some thoughts on the fashion and they aren’t shy when asked to share those thoughts with over-exaggerations and hyperbole.
[4:02:28 PM] Brad says: Ryan Seacrest asked Lupita Nyong’o if she celebrated her birthday yesterday. I guess… as opposed to not celebrating her birthday?
[4:03:19 PM] Brad says: These people keep saying everyone looks great, but don’t they go shit all over them after the show?
[4:03:28 PM] Laremy says: I’m now watching ABC with Jess Cagle and Robin Roberts. True story, one time they needed a critic for the Early Show on CBS, and I sent them a tape of my work. They went with Jess Cagle instead, which makes sense, because he’s really good. Still, I sort of hate him, and now I’m hoping you’ll join me in that hate. Together, we will become more powerful than they can possibly IMAGINE.
[4:03:59 PM] Brad says: “Welcome to the Oscars,” said Ryan Seacrest to Naomi Watts. “Thanks,” she replied. Great interview.
[4:04:58 PM] Laremy says: Viola Davis is like seven inches taller than Jess Cagle. I bet he’s even comfortable on domestic planes. Yet another reason to hold a grudge.
[4:05:47 PM] Laremy says: Ooooh, there’s June Squibb, Squibbin’ it up.
[4:05:50 PM] Brad says: June Squibb is here, and I don’t mean this to sound too mean, but I would just love it if she had shown up on a Rascal scooter. Beep! Beep!
[4:06:57 PM] Laremy says: So many Derns at the Oscars tonight!
[4:08:46 PM] Brad says: Jared Leto and June Squibb just confirmed they are dating, it started at the Santa Barbara Film Festival when Jared helped her up onto the dais.
[4:12:50 PM] Brad says: Anna Kendrick says filming Into the Woods was “insane” and “magical”. It will probably be the best movie EVER!
[4:13:30 PM] Laremy says: I’m telling you, American Hustle n’ Bustle is gonna flex some muscle this evening.
[4:13:43 PM] Laremy says: Hey, are they gonna cut in with any updates about The Ukraine?
[4:15:30 PM] Laremy says: ABC hasn’t been super critical of any of the actors so far. Weird.
[4:15:44 PM] Brad says: Benedict Cumberbatch’s handler is getting pretty pushy.
[4:17:03 PM] Brad says: I’m over on ABC and Frodo is interviewing Olivia Wilde and Jason Sudeikis.
[4:19:34 PM] Brad says: I think Bette Midler and Pink are performing together. I think Pink is going to fall from the ceiling, pick her up and body slam her back to the ground.
[4:19:39 PM] Laremy says: You can throw out the record books when Bette Midler dusts off the microphone to sing at The Academy Awards.
[4:22:42 PM] Brad says: Sarah Paulson looks so different to me. Is it just the hair?
[4:23:23 PM] Brad says: Cate Blanchett’s turn with Ryan Seacrest, let’s talk Woody Allen… Oh, wait, they’re just talking about her movie.
[4:24:41 PM] Laremy says: If Naomi Watts were a boxer she’d definitely be called Naomi “Lights Out” Watts.
[4:26:03 PM] Brad says: Matty McC is chatting it up with his mom and girlfriend?
[4:26:32 PM] Brad says: Oh, now the briefcases have arrived with the winners listed. Oh god! The envelopes fell out and we now know all the winners.
[4:29:16 PM] Laremy says: It’s amazing that B-Luv and only have three different. The Academy Awards are getting so chalky. They are like the movie Powder.
[4:29:22 PM] Brad says: Oh, it’s his wife. My fault.
[4:30:52 PM] Brad says: Jennifer Lawrence wore red, that’s a big deal apparently.
[4:33:33 PM] Laremy says: Who do you guys think is going to win Best Picture next year? I say Brave 2.
[4:34:15 PM] Brad says: Switching between ABC and E! means seeing the same people back-to-back. I’m sticking with ABC now for the duration and we’re here with Cate Blanchett again.
[4:35:07 PM] Brad says: Anne Hathaway is handing out smooches.
[4:36:30 PM] Laremy says: Jonah Hill brought his mom? What a waste.
[4:40:24 PM] Brad says: Leonardo DiCaprio will now brag about how many women he’s dated and had sex with. George Clooney is next.
[4:40:56 PM] Laremy says: Leonardo DiCaprio is super famous.
[4:46:22 PM] Laremy says: I just ordered a grilled cheese from room service.
[4:47:21 PM] Brad says: Apparently a study was done and no one has ever worn red and won the Oscar. I can’t verify this, but Jennifer Lawrence is wearing red. Yup, major issue here folks.
[4:48:44 PM] Brad says: Can you guys believe Laremy went way out on a limb and predicted American Hustle to win Best Picture? Anyone agree with that pick? Anyone? ANYONE?!?!?!
[4:53:22 PM] Laremy says: I agree with that pick.
[4:55:36 PM] Laremy says: Ooooh, Cagle went for the hug on Jared Leto and got the denial handshake instead! People are joining our movement!
[5:01:40 PM] Brad says: We are Skyping people in, FaceTiming Laremy in and it is quite the party over here. Now Tyson is interviewing Lupita Nyong’0, who really does look great.
[5:01:52 PM] Laremy says: I thought it was about to start and then I saw we still have 30 minutes left. That hurt my spirit.
[5:04:35 PM] Laremy says: Overheard in the room, “She looks like a doily”.
[5:04:45 PM] Brad says: Juila Roberts isn’t getting a lot of love in my house, one person says it looks like a doily and another says her boobs look low. You be the judge.
[5:05:32 PM] Brad says: Bill Murray is presenting tonight, that might be fun.
[5:05:52 PM] Laremy says: Bill Murray, y’all. He had the best hanj scene of 2012.
[5:07:04 PM] Brad says: Oh, nice, Jimmy Kimmel got dressed up.
[5:07:54 PM] Laremy says: Jimmy Kimmel is making fun of Oscar viewers. Which is weird.
[5:10:47 PM] Brad says: Okay, we are going to do a page break and head over to page two. All you have to do is click here to join us.
