BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS
Alan Arkin hits out the Supporting Actress nominees. If Ruby Dee wins, I scream. Five minutes of screen time. Judi Dench had eight in Shakespeare in Love, and that was bad.
Tilda Swinton wins! And she looks legitimately shocked! I’m cool with this because I think she looks like an alien in real life and I admire that. Also, she’s very good and vanity-free in Michael Clayton. Push comes to shove though, Amy Ryan would have had my vote.
Swinton gives her Oscar to her agent and thanks her cast and crew. It’s a genuine smile moment. This was a big win for me. 6 for 9.
Jessica Alba. Technical awards … I’m suddenly really tired and don’t care what this is all about.
We move on…
BEST ADAPTED SCREENPLAY
Josh Brolin and James McAvoy engage in some playful banter before Joel and Ethan Coen snag the award. No real shock. Ethan Coen says part of their success in adapting screenplays is how selective they are in the process. “We’ve only adapted Homer and Cormac McCarthy.” Now it’s Joel’s turn at the mic. His jaw moves … his mouth agape … his eyes scan the crowd … he turns to Josh Brolin … now back at the mic … and he says … “Thank you.” Pure Coen irony and awkwardness. Yes it’s a word. Just don’t look it up, or do, it’s a’ight. 7 for 10.
Oscar dictator Sid Ganis comes out to show a bit of how the Academy voting process works. I almost fast-forward through this (I’m a little behind because I paused to look at Marion Cotillard for a few minutes) when I come across an astonishing fact … Michael Bay is an Academy member.
Hannah Montana introduces “That’s How You Know” from Enchanted. Something about this makes my eye twitch.
BEST SOUND EDITING
Jon Stewart introduces Judi Dench and Halle Berry for Sound Editing only to have Seth Rogan and Jonah Hill walk onto the stage. They argue over who should have Halle Berry’s part of the intro and who is more Judi Dench like. It’s pretty amusing.
Transformers has this. It’s the loudest movie of the bunch. And the winner is … Bourne Ultimatum. Ouch. Bay has screwed me twice this evening. He better at least pay for the check. 7 for 11. Mayday, Mayday.
BEST SOUND MIXING
Seth and Jonah are still here arguing over who is Halle Berry. It works, just let yourself love these guys. I picked Ratatouille here which should mean Transformers wins.
Nope. Bourne Ultimatum wins again. Okay, I want to go on record about this. I love this movie. No problem with these wins. But Academy voters … you do realize The Bourne Supremacy was the best of the series right? This is an admission that you screwed the pooch on that movie. I want blood over this. I’m 7 for 12.
