Box-Office Oracle: Jun. 1 – Jun. 3

Was it as massive a hit as I thought it would be? No. As I’d hoped it would be? No. This just proves, once again, that I am not at all like God in terms of my powers.

Estimate: $65.4 million

If we start now we can gather a few million letters begging them not to bring this one back. It’s not that it was bad, per se, it was just that it was nothing new. Personally I like new things.

Estimate: $24.6 million

If it debuts this low, and it could jump up a bit, it won’t have much drop off next weekend. They don’t have a star everyone knows, but back in the day Carell wasn’t a big star either. Apatow only makes big stars, he doesn’t pay them.

Estimate: $22.2 million

This is an extremely hopeful projection – and those always screw me. No one wants to see Costner, much less Costner in a non-traditional role. This is going to get murdered. But you personally should see it. Make a difference!

Estimate: $12.6 million

This is like that bully you grew up with – at first you wished him dead. But then, a few years later, after he dropped out you heard he breaks apart cement blocks for a living. Then you sort of feel bad for him.

Estimate: $7.9 million

Carly Schroeder is hot. Extremely underage, but still. Man, now I don’t know why I even started this train of thought. Takeaway: Gracie won’t make very much, not in enough theaters, sorry Carly.

Estimate: $4.0 million

Poor Linds Lo. She’s not like that bully you grew up with at all, she’s like the messed up girl you grew up with that you were equal parts freaked out by and fascinated with. As for Bug, well B-Luv keeps bugging me to see it. I think not though.

Estimate: $2.6 million

This one crept up on me last week and took my rankings for an inaccuracy ride. This makes me angry with a perfectly innocent film. Sorry, I’ll simmer down.

Estimate: $1.5 million

Only one project remains. 28 Years Later. I think they’ve already started penning the script and are in talks with Dre to play the head zombie.

Estimate: $1.5 million

Shia who? Shia what? He’s leaving the top ten for a few minutes, but fear not, he’ll be back in about a month.

Estimate: $1.4 million