Without credits, Snow White: ADS runs a shade more than 75 minutes. To call those minutes excruciating is being way too kind. After 15 youll be wondering if its almost over, but thats only if you sit down to watch it. Dont.
This Snow White is a rich girl named Snow (Shanley Caswell) who is acting out because she doesnt like her fathers (Eric Roberts, onscreen for a few minutes tops) new wife, Eve (The Brady Bunch TV shows Maureen McCormick, who has seen better days). Eve wants Snow out of the picture, so after the troubled teen is party to grand theft auto, Snows father agrees with Eves suggestion of a 4-week discipline camp.
Camp Allegiance is run by ex-Navy SEAL Hunter (Tim Abell). He takes great pleasure in whipping spoiled, selfish teens into shape. At his camp the youngsters will partake in rigorous physical activities like running and manual labor. Unfortunately they will also be killed one-by-one.
Snow White: ADS has strange ideas when it comes to generating suspense. This is supposed to be a thriller after all. Heres how it tries to create said thrills. Ominous music starts playing. We see the moon (at night) followed by dense woods (during the day). Then someone in a black hoodie starts running around aimlessly, also during the day. This happens too many times to count.
The kills are just as poorly handled. They all happen in broad daylight. Theyre all bloodless. The staging suggests a director who has never been behind a camera before.
For some reason, this melodramatic nonsense is rated PG-13. It fails to take advantage of how trashy it is and seems to want to be. It teases with sex/nudity and graphic violence but never actually shows anything. Are that many people under 17 really interested in renting something like this? That seems highly doubtful. It should have fully embraced its ridiculousness. Playing it safe only makes it more bland and tedious.
And whoever said this movie is like Children of the Corn Meets A Nightmare on Elm Street needs their head examined. The DVD cover attributes it to Independent Film Quarterly. It is nothing like either one. There are no homicidal children in it. You cant be killed in a dream. Great marketing ploy, but total nonsense. And why compare it to two R-rated horror movies if youre selling a teen thriller?
Snow White: A Deadly Summer only has two assets, and they dont come close to making it worth watching. The scenery is nice, and some of the dialogue provides unintentional laughs. Ill beat the white off your Snow White ass and a teen angrily shouting What is this, brandy? are my two favorite examples.
DeCoteau movies must have an audience considering that he keeps making them. Its hard to imagine that would be true if they were losing money. This one suggests that no one involved was trying to do anything other than exploit the title. Dont reward them by watching it.
