Cursed to Golf Review: 18 Hell Holes

Cursed to Golf Review: Hole-y Hell

Roguelikes have invaded a ton of genres from management sims to card battlers to shooters to rhythm games, so it’s only natural that sports games would get in on the trend. And since Electronic Arts won’t make a golf game where the golfers are actually stuck in an endless purgatory, Chuhai Labs has taken to the course itself and done exactly that with Cursed to Golf. This stylized roguelike is a clever spin on the typical golf game, but it’s also initially difficult enough to snap a club in two.

The core golfing mechanics are easy to grasp, as they are almost exactly what golf games have been doing for decades: one meter dictates power while another decides the angle. There are also three different clubs that have their own ranges and specialties. Knowing what one to pick, how hard to hit the ball, and where to send it is simple science that’s easy to understand but is difficult to master because of the timing and foresight each hit requires. Manually controlling the ball’s spin adds yet another dimension, as does calculating for bounces, which makes every shot engaging.

It has most of the basics down, but not all of them. Aiming is particularly annoying sometimes because, while the camera can be slightly adjusted, the game doesn’t let players zoom out while lining up a shot. This means many shots require a lot of guesswork since there’s not enough information to go off of while actually whacking the ball; the aiming cursor gets cut off rather easily. Letting players see exactly where the ball is going to land might have made the game too easy, but only showing some of the ball’s arc hides necessary information. A better compromise would be to let players zoom out, but doing so would also nix some of the aiming arc, which would yield a more accurate model of where the ball will land without spelling all of it out.

Cursed to Golf Review: Hole-y Hell

Cursed to Golf’s fantastical roguelike elements is where it goes beyond being just an ordinary 2D golf game. The randomly ordered courses in each of the four worlds are visually striking, often fusing otherworldly landscapes with all sorts of golf paraphernalia to create a unique overall style. One stage has golf ball buildings in the background that are lit by a huge golf ball moon, while another is a desert littered with mountain-sized tees and giant dinosaur bones with golf balls for horns.

Its suite of bosses is also intricately designed, adorned with all sorts of golfing material, and brought to life through its vibrant pixelated art style and incredible sprite work. Each also has an accompanying soundtrack, which are all excellent, upbeat retro tunes with absurdly catchy rhythms. The Scotsman’s theme is the best in a list of absolute bops, as its combination of chiptune and traditional Scottish music could probably be looped in actual purgatory and still not get old.

The game’s beautiful and unpredictable courses are not only visually designed well but are also lovingly constructed, too. Stages are almost always sprawling labyrinths (with helpful signs that point toward the goal) and offer a liberating amount of paths to the hole and add a bunch of strategy. They often intelligently make players weigh risks and rewards, as one branch may be filled with hazards but yield a prize for getting through it, while another might be longer yet be much safer. Some even call upon specific power-ups and reward players for saving the right ability for the right time.

Cursed to Golf Review: Hole-y Hell

Power-ups are crucial for getting through the game since it is incredibly challenging. A few poor putts or a badly timed drive into some spikes can end a run prematurely, making ability management just as important as lining up a shot. These moves range from mundane buffs like upping the par or letting players redo their last shot to goofy powers that can turn the ball into a rocket, drill, or fireball. Cards are doled out at a frequency that discourages hoarding and the game’s difficulty pressures players to use these assists frequently and tactically, leading to a more varied and exciting run through its 18 ever-changing holes.

While the challenge can be exhilarating under the right circumstances, Cursed to Golf sometimes ratchets up the difficulty through unfair means. The aforementioned aiming issue is a big central sticking point since it is a persistent handicap that can lead to many bad, half-blind shots. A few of the holes also seem to not have any room for error or missing idols (which grant precious extra strokes). It’s easy to wonder if its gluttony of power-up cards are meant to brute force these occasional difficulty spikes.

Teleporters also weirdly aren’t marked, making it a gamble to see where the ball will end up once it goes through. Warp pipes are technically marked, but the hilariously tiny pixel marker that inches toward the other side at a snail’s pace isn’t worth sitting through. And even though most cards are self-explanatory, some aren’t and make using the more vague ones not worth the hassle. It’s obvious what a rocket ball does, but it’s not clear what a lightning ball would do or how exactly the phase card works. The practice course is confusingly unavailable after the first biome and testing these out during a live match is a tough sell.

Cursed to Golf Review: Hole-y Hell

All of these bizarre choices on top of its overall difficulty make Cursed to Golf a tough trek through golfing purgatory, but almost all of them can be easily bypassed by quitting out to the main menu. For some reason, exiting to the menu from the pause menu or just outright closing the game offers a free restart on any course with no penalty, which is tantalizing in the face of impending death that’s a result of one of the previously mentioned issues. Save scumming (which is also possible here) at least takes some effort to abuse, but just being able to undo mistakes with such little hassle calls into question its roguelike nature because of how simply that nature can easily be nullified. Accessibility options are one thing, but this just seems like an oversight.

Much like its cursed chibi protagonist, Cursed to Golf is stuck in a sort of purgatory. Its unique mix of golf and roguelike mechanics, sublime soundtrack, and charming style ram up against its sometimes unfair difficulty and handful of questionable design decisions. This collision of relatively high highs and frustrating lows results in a game that is caught in this intermediary state between greatness and mediocrity, never committing to one side for too long yet still favoring the former. Cursed to Golf may hit a few into the bunker, but still manages to come in exactly par.

SCORE: 7/10

As ComingSoon’s review policy explains, a score of 7 equates to “Good.” A successful piece of entertainment that is worth checking out, but it may not appeal to everyone.


Disclosure: The publisher provided a PlayStation 5 copy for our Cursed to Golf review. Reviewed on version 1.002.000.
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