Based on the number of websites that rushed to get up this latest trailer for The Canyons starring Lindsay Lohan and a porn star named James Deen (Girth Brooks was his first choice, but it was taken) you’d think it was a movie people would actually care to see. New “’50s Style Trailer for The Canyons!” the headlines read… I clicked. I watched… 48 seconds of it.
I don’t know where the joke ends and the movie begins, but this trailer is promoting something no one wants to watch unless they’re drunk, high or deceased so it probably doesn’t matter.
The Canyons is described as a contemporary L.A. noir about the dangers of sexual obsession and ambition, both personally and professionally, among a group of young people in their 20s and how one chance meeting connected to the past unravels all of their lives, resulting in deceit, paranoia, cruel mind games and ultimately violence.
Gus Van Sant actually has a role in this one, playing the psychiatrist of the lead character, Christian (Deen), a film producer that enjoys filming his own three-way sex sessions. Lohan plays Tara, Christian’s girlfriend and former model. Paul Schrader directs from a script by Bret Easton Ellis.
If there was any hope for this film, it would be hope this trailer was made as a one-off and none of what we’re seeing is actually in the movie. Otherwise this thing hasn’t got a prayer of being seen by anyone outside of the TMZ collective looking to make fun of it.
