Box-Office Wrap-Up: May. 4 – May. 6

That was close eh? $142m. That was the distance between the number one and number two slot. If you’d like a handy picture metaphor click here real quick (then click back!).
#1 movie predicted correctly: One Week In A Row
Ten percent off would have been like $15m. So I was right around four percent off, and I nailed that they’d get the record. Now, for my next trick, I think this one doesn’t crack $100m next week. And once I find my calculator I’ll get even closer than that for ya.
Result: $148.0 million (My rank: #1, $5.6m off)
It’s been in the top two for a month! That’s the route to take guys, don’t mention that the first place movie made 26x more money. 26 times?? I would have thought more people would have accidentally purchased the wrong ticket.
Result: $5.7 million (My rank: #3, $.3m off)
Here is where the predictions start looking ugly because these movies made just about nothing. And I predicted a little bit over nothing. So now I’m the bad guy.
Result: $3.4 million (My rank: #6, $.6m off)
If you took all the dollars in slots two through nine and multiplied them by five you’d still be short of $148m. Spider-Man 3 was like me in high school. No contest. They shoulda just closed the place.
Result: $3.1 million (My rank: #4, $1.5m off)
5. Next
People hated Next. To the people, Next sucked. Less than one out of every 600 Americans purchased a ticket for this. We can assume the ones that did were suffering from dementia and were lost.
Result: $2.8 million (My rank: #7, $.8m off)
Pretty easily the worst prediction. Lucky You was JACKED UP this weekend, no one saw this, not even Drew’s family. They probably sat around at dinner Friday night saying stuff like “Hey, did you guys hear Drew’s got another movie out? No seriously. Should we see it?” And then everyone busted out in hysterics. Man, Drew’s family is mean!
Result: $2.5 million (My rank: #2, $10.1m Off)
I nailed the dollar amount but missed the placement. I think this was due to rising oil prices combined with inflation, otherwise I would have nailed it. Damn you Russians!
Result: $2.5 million (My rank: #9, Dead On)
This is a merciless edition of the Oracle because nothing made any damn money. Two million dollars? You kidding me with this?
Result: $2.3 million (My rank: #8, $.3m off)
The unreported story of the weekend is the beating Hot Fuzz took. Well, I’m reporting it. A near 60 percent drop-off means that people wanted laughs from the Spider-Man 3 plot alone.
Result: $2.0 million (My rank: #5, $2.1m off)
Welcome to the Laremy lounge. Next week’s drama: Can Georgia Rule knock off Spidey? Answer: No. Crap, I just destroyed all the drama for next week. Oh well. I promise we’ll find something to talk about.
Result: $1.7 million (My rank: Not Ranked)

LaremyLegel.com, the place where I don’t predict anything.

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